Too many people are being diagnosed with depression when in reality they are just unhappy, says an Australian psychiatrist Gordon Parker.
Parker conducted a study which included 242 teachers who were followed for a period of 15 years. During that time, more than three-quarters of them were found to meet the criteria for clinical depression. These criteria include having a “low mood” for more than two weeks combined with appetite change, sleep disturbance, drop in libido and fatigue.
Parker says that having such a low threshold for diagnosing clinical depression creates the risk of taking the normal ups and downs of living and treating them as an illness. He argues that treating these individuals will not be effective because there is nothing wrong with them.
I tend to agree. Feeling sad occasionally in response to our circumstances is a normal part of living. Emotional pain can be a signal that we need to make some changes in our lives. If you touch a hot pan and get burned, do you take a painkiller to deaden the pain or do you learn from your mistake and use a potholder the next time?
A recent telephone conversation with an acquaintance got me to thinking about stress, anxiety, depression and all that is associated with them. Her life at
home was under so much stress raising her children, she said, it was affecting her
job. She wanted to change job assignments thinking this would cure her stress at
home. She wanted to rid herself of the job stress and drop it on someone else. It’s not as simple as that!
Perhaps the root of the stress or depression is at the home rather than the job itself. If we get to the bottom of the stress at home, then we will bring a better
outcome to the job. We call it working from the inside, out. Fixing our internal
self is a good place to begin. It begins with you, not some other person such as
your husband or children or some external issue. Fixing this first will allow you to
overcome stress or depression. Depression, stress and anxiety are often companions, and this is a global problem. One in six people around the world will suffer from major depression at some point in their lives.
When new challenges and opportunities show up in our lives, we may diagnose ourselves as feeling scared when what we really feel is excited. Often we have not been taught how to welcome the thrill of a new opportunity, and so we opt to back off, indulging our anxiety instead of awakening our courage. One way to inspire ourselves to embrace the opportunities that come our way is to look more deeply into our feelings and see that butterflies in our stomach or a rapidly beating heart are not necessarily a sign that we are afraid. Those very same feelings can be translated as excitement, curiosity, passion, and even love.
There is nothing wrong with being afraid as long as we do not let it stop us from doing the things that excite us. Most of us assume that brave people are fearless, but the truth is that they are simply more comfortable with fear because they face it on a regular basis. The more we do this, the more we feel excitement in the face of challenges rather than anxiety. The more we cultivate our ability to move forward instead of backing off, the more we trust ourselves to be able to handle the new opportunity, whether it’s a new job, an exciting move, or a relationship. When we feel our fear, we can remind ourselves that maybe we are actually just excited. We can assure ourselves that this opportunity has come our way because we are meant to take it.
Framing things just a little differently can dramatically shift our mental state from one of resistance to one of openness. We can practice this new way of seeing things by saying aloud: I am really excited about this job. I am really looking forward to going on a date with this amazing person. I am excited to have the opportunity to do something I have never done before. As we do this, we will feel our energy shift from fear, which paralyzes, to excitement, which empowers us to direct all that energy in the service of moving forward, growing, and learning.
If a person feeds on negative thoughts all day long, every task and every trial that comes his or her way will be approached from a defeatist attitude. We have the ability to replace negative thoughts with positive ones. It takes practice, but it is worth it!
John W. Cargile, Msc.D, D.D. is a licensed pastoral psychology counselor. He is a member of the National Education Association and Alabama Education Association. He is the author of a new novel, The Cry of the Cuckoos. www.thecryofthecuckoos.com You can contact him at jwcargile@charter,net. All conversations are confidential.
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Periods of high stress can make us feel cuckoo or crazy
Most of us feel a little cuckoo or crazy from time to time.
Those of you who have read my new mystery novel, The Cry of the Cuckoos, found out how periods of high stress can alter one’s identity.
The main character, Donald Drummond, finds out he has a biological mother he knew nothing about for 61 years. Upon receiving this knowledge he goes into deep despair. Anxiety disorders among other health issues begin to plague him.
Periods of high stress can make us feel like we’re losing it, as can being surrounded by people whose values are very different from our own.
Drummond’s father dies and the story reveals the father-son relationship was different from one another. They were estranged for many years. Drummond’s life unravels.
Losing a significant relationship and moving into a new life situation are other events that can cause us to feel off kilter. Circumstances like these recur in our lives, and they naturally affect our mental stability.
The symptoms of our state of mind can range from having no recollection of putting our car keys where we eventually find them, to wondering if we’re seeing things clearly when everyone around us seems to be in denial of what’s going on right in front of their eyes.
For most of us, the key to survival at times like these is to step back, take a deep breath, and regain our composure. Then we can decide what course of action to take.
Sometimes a time-out does the trick. We take a day off from whatever is making us feel crazy and, like magic, we feel in our right mind again.
Talking to an objective friend can also help. We begin to see what it is about the situation that destabilizes us, and we can make changes from there. At other times, if the situation is particularly sticky, we may need to seek professional help.
Meeting with someone who understands the way the human mind reacts to stress, loss, and difficulty can make us feel less alone and more supported. A therapist or a spiritual counselor can give us techniques that help bring us back to a sane state of mind so that we can affect useful changes.
They can also mirror our basic goodness, helping us to see that we are actually okay.
The main purpose of the wake-up call that feeling crazy provides is to let us know that something in our lives is out of balance.
Confirm for yourself that you are capable of creating a sane and peaceful reality for yourself. Try to remember that most people have felt, at one time or another that they are losing it. You deserve a life that helps you thrive. Try and take some steps today to help you achieve more balance and a little less crazy.
When we become overwhelmed and things are not going as planned, it is natural to hold tighter to our goals and try to force things to go our way.
In the process, we tie ourselves in knots, tensing our shoulders, jaws, and muscles throughout our bodies.
Our mind tells us that this is how to get a firmer grip on a situation that feels out of control, but as we create knots in our bodies we are blocking the flow of our energy, exhausting ourselves by exerting more effort yet accomplishing less.
At these times, though it may seem counterintuitive, our higher selves know it’s better to let go.
This may not be quite as easy as it sounds.
After the relief of our first decision to release, if we allow questions about how to get everything done to start again, the knots will be back before we know it.
So we need to be aware that this is a process to breathe through. First, we need to let go of our idea of what the perfect outcome should be, and allow that the intelligence that drives the universe knows better than we do how everything fits together for the highest good.
Then we might have to release our imagined consequences and realize that, in most cases, the worst that could happen really isn’t that bad. We may need to remember how to relax, first by taking deep breaths, then by meditating, and then perhaps seeking help from a loved one, massage therapist, or energy healer to clear the underlying knots.
We can ease our mental stress by prioritizing what we truly want to accomplish, and then delegating the rest to someone who has more enthusiasm for those things. When we relax and let life’s energy flow through our minds, bodies, spirits, and lives, we will find that we can accomplish more with less effort and feel good doing it.
We don’t have to tie ourselves in knots. Instead, we can let the ribbons of our energy unfurl to gracefully direct us through life’s abundant flow.
John W. Cargile, Msc.D, D.D. is a licensed pastoral psychology counselor. He is a member of the National Education Association and Alabama Education Association. He is the author of a new novel, The Cry of the Cuckoos. www.thecryofthecuckoos.com You can contact him at jwcargile@charter,net. All conversations are confidential.
Those of you who have read my new mystery novel, The Cry of the Cuckoos, found out how periods of high stress can alter one’s identity.
The main character, Donald Drummond, finds out he has a biological mother he knew nothing about for 61 years. Upon receiving this knowledge he goes into deep despair. Anxiety disorders among other health issues begin to plague him.
Periods of high stress can make us feel like we’re losing it, as can being surrounded by people whose values are very different from our own.
Drummond’s father dies and the story reveals the father-son relationship was different from one another. They were estranged for many years. Drummond’s life unravels.
Losing a significant relationship and moving into a new life situation are other events that can cause us to feel off kilter. Circumstances like these recur in our lives, and they naturally affect our mental stability.
The symptoms of our state of mind can range from having no recollection of putting our car keys where we eventually find them, to wondering if we’re seeing things clearly when everyone around us seems to be in denial of what’s going on right in front of their eyes.
For most of us, the key to survival at times like these is to step back, take a deep breath, and regain our composure. Then we can decide what course of action to take.
Sometimes a time-out does the trick. We take a day off from whatever is making us feel crazy and, like magic, we feel in our right mind again.
Talking to an objective friend can also help. We begin to see what it is about the situation that destabilizes us, and we can make changes from there. At other times, if the situation is particularly sticky, we may need to seek professional help.
Meeting with someone who understands the way the human mind reacts to stress, loss, and difficulty can make us feel less alone and more supported. A therapist or a spiritual counselor can give us techniques that help bring us back to a sane state of mind so that we can affect useful changes.
They can also mirror our basic goodness, helping us to see that we are actually okay.
The main purpose of the wake-up call that feeling crazy provides is to let us know that something in our lives is out of balance.
Confirm for yourself that you are capable of creating a sane and peaceful reality for yourself. Try to remember that most people have felt, at one time or another that they are losing it. You deserve a life that helps you thrive. Try and take some steps today to help you achieve more balance and a little less crazy.
When we become overwhelmed and things are not going as planned, it is natural to hold tighter to our goals and try to force things to go our way.
In the process, we tie ourselves in knots, tensing our shoulders, jaws, and muscles throughout our bodies.
Our mind tells us that this is how to get a firmer grip on a situation that feels out of control, but as we create knots in our bodies we are blocking the flow of our energy, exhausting ourselves by exerting more effort yet accomplishing less.
At these times, though it may seem counterintuitive, our higher selves know it’s better to let go.
This may not be quite as easy as it sounds.
After the relief of our first decision to release, if we allow questions about how to get everything done to start again, the knots will be back before we know it.
So we need to be aware that this is a process to breathe through. First, we need to let go of our idea of what the perfect outcome should be, and allow that the intelligence that drives the universe knows better than we do how everything fits together for the highest good.
Then we might have to release our imagined consequences and realize that, in most cases, the worst that could happen really isn’t that bad. We may need to remember how to relax, first by taking deep breaths, then by meditating, and then perhaps seeking help from a loved one, massage therapist, or energy healer to clear the underlying knots.
We can ease our mental stress by prioritizing what we truly want to accomplish, and then delegating the rest to someone who has more enthusiasm for those things. When we relax and let life’s energy flow through our minds, bodies, spirits, and lives, we will find that we can accomplish more with less effort and feel good doing it.
We don’t have to tie ourselves in knots. Instead, we can let the ribbons of our energy unfurl to gracefully direct us through life’s abundant flow.
John W. Cargile, Msc.D, D.D. is a licensed pastoral psychology counselor. He is a member of the National Education Association and Alabama Education Association. He is the author of a new novel, The Cry of the Cuckoos. www.thecryofthecuckoos.com You can contact him at jwcargile@charter,net. All conversations are confidential.
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